SCP-914, The Clockworks

{t}: Exile a creature, then roll a dice
1: Rough, Destroy the exiled creature
2: Course, Return exiled creature to the
battlefield with a -1/-1 counter on it.
3: 1:1, Return exiled creature to the battlefield
4: Fine, return the exiled creature to the
battlefield with two +1/+1 counters on it
5: Very Fine: Flip a coin, if heads, return the
exiled creature to the battlefield with eight +1/+1
counters on it. If tails, Exile that creature
permanently and you lose 4 life.